Somewhere along the way in my life I lost myself. I think that’s normal at sometime in the course of parenthood though. You are “mom” or “dad”.
You become one with the label.
There is no escape.
I’m raising three children as a single mom. I work full time. I own a house. I pay the bills. I cook the meals. I could go on for a long time about what I do and who I am, but the truth of the matter is that unless you are a single parent you can’t really understand what it’s like. How hard it can be.
The fight that this life has required is just ridiculous and I’m ready to take back.
My kids are so well behaved and I relish in knowing that I am doing a good job. My #1 priority is and always will be my kids. I do what I do, and give up what I give up, for them.
But in trying to be everything to everyone 100% of the time I lost myself. And in losing myself I really was just giving everyone pieces of me.
That fractured person just isn’t good enough for me.
I am in the process of losing the last 20 lbs that I gained when life got sucky. (1/4 way there!)
I will get my hair done regularly. (Natalie is doing her happy dance right now.)
I will say no. (My kids are not doing a happy dance right now.)
I will be in control.
I will give more to those who have less.
I will go where I want to go.
I will put those skinny jeans and new boots on and rock the shit out of them.
When life gets screwy, I will take a deep breath and stand back up.
I didn’t say 2013 is the year for me, because it isn’t. I’m sure some kind of crap will sneak in and try to shake my resolve, but I’m not having it. We all have big hopes for the new year. Mine happened to be squashed on Jan 1 when we missed our flight, but hey… I got some great shots!
2013 is the year of me because I am going to put this puzzle back together. I am going to take the beaten down piece of me and match it with the confident woman piece. I’m going to match that tired mom piece with the calm and peaceful piece. That disorganized and disheveled piece will match with the pulled-together confident woman piece. The taxi mom piece will fit with the in control piece. And somehow, this puzzle of 2,000 pieces of me will fit together perfectly.
2013 is the year of me
What have you done for “me” lately?
(Bloggers, feel free to use the meme and post why 2013 is the year for you, please just link back to this post.)